Hi all I need some guidance. I had a sti panel done in July/ all tests negative. Had a new partner in oct/nov (I'm cisfemale he is cismale) and when that relationship was over I went to my dr before getting sexual with next partner for new sti tests to be sure. I found out this morning that I have been exposed to herpes and that was not the case in July so I'm thinking it was the oct/ nov person that i was exposed by. I have no symptoms  outbreaks cold sores nothing at all. The nurse said it can only be transmitted during an outbreak but I have a friend w herpes who said that is not the case. And the person I guess that exposed me to it didn't have anything I could see but then I guess one could have cold sore in their mouth and I would not know/ they might not even know.  So my question is : where can I get accurate info on this? Do I really "have" herpes? And aren't i obligated to let the person who exposed me know in case he doesn't know he's carrying it? Even if that means a text message as we are no longer speaking / for unrelated reasons. And I need to tell my current and future partners as well is what I'm thinking, because karma is just that way. Any thoughts on this are appreciated. Thanks all.

7 Responses to Herpes exposure help please

  1. SseFriut says:

    No cookie for that nurse.

    Some people are asymptomatic shedders of the herpes virus (which means that the virus is actively spread even without an outbreak). Do you know what type you were exposed to? Type 1 is *usually* oral herpes and Type 2 is *usually* genital (I say usually because, while they tend to stick to their favourite hangouts, they can be opportunistic little buggers and jump ship).

    Because herpes isn’t a reportable STI, you have no legal obligation to tell anyone anything (but your moral standpoint may of course differ). Telling your former partner would be a nice gesture, just so he knows that he is infected and may be an asymptomatic shedder. As for future partners, it would be good to let them know that you have been exposed but have never had an outbreak (they may want to be tested as well, but a large percentage of the population carries antibodies for herpes).

  2. Eanva says:

    ^^ Yup. Nurse was wrong, friend was right!

  3. Hteall says:

    From what I’ve read, everyone who has an infection can be an asymptomatic shedder of the virus, about 5% of the time on average!

    No cookie for that nurse at all.

  4. Epaofa says:

    i got it when the person wasn’t broken out. it can be passed whenever, but if theyre broken out or about to break out, just count on having it. Theres like a 60 something percent chance you can get it while not broken out, taking Valtrax takes away another some odd percentage and keeps the virus in remission.

    unfortunately with me, his dumb ass KNEW there was a possibility he had it from an ex (confirmed BY ex) and he never told me.

  5. 29dWoman says:

    You might want to get a blood test to determine if you even have it, and specifically what type.

  6. OyrZero says:

    I think what you are saying is that your STI panel earlier did not show you had been exposed to herpes, but the most recent one did. If that is right, you should be aware that there are significant levels of false positives and false negatives. It might be worth repeating the test (which I assume is a blood test since you haven’t had any symptoms) to improve the probability that you know what is going on. Testing for HSV isn’t normally part of a STI panel unless there are symptoms, so I am a bit surprised that your STI panels included this.

    If you do have HSV antibodies (which is what the blood test looks for), I think future partners should know that. I would advise that you do a lot of reading about HSV so you can share what you have learned with partners. One thing you will learn that a large fraction of the population has been exposed to HSV and many do not know it. Just to help your perspective on this.

  7. Aixoya says:

    Thanks to all who have commented. It was from the blood test but I specifically requested it along with trich, yeast and bv/ was trying to cover all based. I’ll call and see if they can specify type and go from there. And also see about re testing and when. Thanks muchly all 🙂

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